Motherhood at Two Weeks
It’s been two weeks, and a lifetime, and one second. I’m on a 24-hour clock, and yet time is not existent. Amidst the incredible newness, a friend asked me if I could even describe my love for Boyd. Of course you can’t. And yet of course, here’s what I came up with:
Having a baby literally broke my heart wide open. It changed the way I think about humanity and makes every child feel like it’s my child. Every ache and pain that they have, my kid has too. Every mom is me. Every mom is equal and utterly clueless and also infinitely wise.
It is the ultimate heartbreak – In the best of ways. It breaks your heart so deeply that you feel everything more intensely and clearly and heavily.
When you look into your baby’s eyes, it’s like star gazing through a telescope for the first time. You can see how small you are and how big the universe is, but also how endless the potential is for miracles and amazement; for beauty and for suffering; for surprise and delight.
There is no comparison, it’s totally surreal, and all the clichés are true.